我对你的感受

01-01-2012

其实我很想告诉你我对你的感受，但是我不想破坏我们之间的友情。而且我知道你心里有另一个他，所以才不告诉你。我不知道你是不是感觉到我对你的感受而对我冷淡。其实我没有要求什么，只要你开心就好。我只是想和你做好朋友，我的要求并不高。不论如何，我会想办法去忘记你因为我知道我们的关系只能去到好朋友，我也知道你不会考虑我当你的情人。不知为什么我对你会那么的死心塌地，是不是我对你的感觉太深？还有，每一次我 whatsapp 你，我只是以好朋友的身份与你聊天。我只是想和你分担一些你的烦恼或者当你不开心的时候在你的身边陪伴你。其实我也不记得我是怎么认识你，我只记得我们成为好朋友后，我们时常去 souled out 喝酒，吃东西还有聊天或是去 mamak，tutti frutti，lok lok。今天我会试看去忘记你，因为我不想要再为你而烦恼和我的人生不只是有你一个，我还有我的家人，朋友和学业。另一个原因是因为如果我再为你而烦恼，我不知道要怎么去面对你。其实现在我也不知道要怎么去面对你了，但我会用平常心去面对你。为什么我会做朋友做得这么失败？我已经没有了我最好的朋友，V，其实不只他，我已经没了好多个好朋友。我不想连你这个好朋友也没了。我应该对你坦白吗？如果我告诉你我的感觉，我心会好过点吗？我已经改了很多，我已经不是以前的我了。现在的我是一个会为朋友想与珍惜他们的我，我也不会拿朋友的便宜了。我以前失去太多东西了。

02-01-2012
你已经走了，我也开始想念你了。你今天问了我一个问题，＂男人可不可以和女人做朋友？＂。那我就答你，＂为什么不可以？＂。其实我觉得如果那个男的对女的没有感情，这样男人和女人就可以做朋友。无论如何，我还是会把我的感觉收起来。那是因为我怕是我说了以后的后果。其实我想告诉你我的感觉，但是我不知道要怎么告诉你。我刚刚用了我们之前的友情来做试验，但是你还没有回答我。我在等你的答案。你在避开我吗？还是你不想回答我？还有几分钟就要第三天了，你还不回我？唉！

03-01-2012
当我起床时，我第一个想的人是你，我不知道为什么。我也不知哪里来的勇气要和你表白。今天是我第一天上课，也是最忙的一天。我觉得晚饭以后再向你坦白。在 7.30pm，我已经做了我应该做的事。总算有个答案，我也觉得松了一口气。

My Wish~

I'm kinda exhausted today, will talk about my trip to Bath when I update my blog the next time.

All I want for my birthday wish is I wanna spend my birthday with my best buddy-bro.

That's all I want.

Depression

Quote of The Day: Depression is close to me, but suicide hasn't been...

Broken Friendship

Are you really gone?

As my day draws out, I find myself thinking about you.

I miss you, my brother. And I wish you were by my side.

You are like a real brother to me and I hate not having you here.

Never being able to see you or talk to you would be my greatest fear.

I regret for what I did to you and I'm sorry, brother.

Brother, will we able to laugh again?

We had so much fun together but thinking of it now makes me sad.

Do you think that I will ever get a chance to prove myself that I'll change and be your good brother again?

You probably think that I'm a bad person and I wish that wasn't true.

I wish that you will understand how much I care about this friendship.

I wish things were different and not being able to talk to you doesn't seem fair.

I miss our silly jokes, I miss our bond of trust.

I hate not being able to talk to you and I don't want to have to adjust my life.

I wish I had the opportunity to sit and talk with you about our problems.

I'm not a bad person.

It's heartbroken to think about our broken friendship everyday.

You are a great brother and I have so much respect for you.

I wish we can still laugh and joke like we used to be.

I hope we will always be best friends & brothers.

Quote of The Day: The disappointment of losing a best friend is huge.

~Life in London~

It's been awhile I last updated my blog... I guess I should talk about my life in London...

This is my ugly hair after coming to London...

Steamboat with Chong Hor, Bo Yuan & Kee Aik in London...

New t-shirts & shoes that I bought in London~

Limited Edition Royal Wedding Oyster Card...

A beautiful view in Hyde Park~

A beautiful night view in London!

Classic Hot Chocolate with Whipped Cream & Chocolate from Starbucks~ Yum~

Homemade Aglio Olio...

 Cheese Baked Pasta~~

Lamb Chop with Garlic Bread, Broccoli, Potatoes, Scallops & Oyster Mushrooms~

 Pork Kebab with Asparagus, Potatoes, Garlic Bread & Mushrooms~

Grilled Salmon with Potatoes, Squids, Oyster Mushrooms & Scallops~

I guess that's about it for now...

Quote of The Day: You can't do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.

The Past...

I know I hurt you so badly once but I really didn't mean to, I'm sorry...

I do feel bad, guilty and heartbroken when I saw all those tweets today...

You felt that way because of me and you had me thinking as well, why didn't I die during my car accident?

If I was dead, maybe you wouldn't be hurting so badly...

*Touch Wood*

I always think of my past when I'm in the bus or underground tube...

And I always say to myself, how I wish I can turn back time or change the past...

I didn't want my life to be like that... But the past is the past...

I have to move on in my life so I can get a better future...

I can move on in anything in my life but one thing I can't is that I can't forget about you...

I still do love you...

I still do miss you...

Even though we're 10576 miles apart...

Just wanna say, I'm sorry...

Quote of The Day: Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future...

The Feeling of Guilt & Lonely...

We have been best friends but I don't know about it now.

To be honest, I'm sorry that I didn't appreciate our friendship properly.

When back in M'sia, you used to be there when I need you and I didn't be there for you when you need me.

I feel so bad and guilty. And I feel lonely after I came to London.

Now I'm hoping to make things right. Tmr I gonna go get my part-time job.

And I made a promise to myself that I'll buy you dinner when I got my first salary.

Other than that, I'll definitely buy some decoration things for your new house.

And also buy you a BIRTHDAY present even though I know it's too late.

I really wanna make it up to you. And I promise that I'll put more effort into our FRIENDSHIP.

And you know what, my brother, I put everything aside already.

My family and studies are now my first priority.

I did take your advice.

I have been thinking so much when I stepped into UK.

I know how I treated you back in M'sia and I feel so bad.

When I was on my way back to my hostel, I was thinking about our friendship.

I really can't afford to lose a good BROTHER like you.

Once again, I'm sorry.

Quote of The Day: True friendship is like sound health, the value of it is seldom known until it's lost...

A Second Chance...

I was so shocked when you pm me on skype that day.

Because you seldom and barely do that.  =P

But this time is different from the other time.

I'm not gonna go into details but I just wanna there is always a second chance.

Btw, I really wanna thank you for giving me a second chance again.

And believe me, I will not disappoint you again.

Thinking Of You...

I can't got to sleep, I'm just thinking of you, thinking of tonight...

And all of the feelings coming through when I'm with you.

There's nowhere else I want to be.

It's only 10.30pm and I'm thinking of you.

You're perfect in every way.

I prayed for someone like you.

I'm wide-awake thinking of you.

You must be an angel, there's no other explanation.

There feelings are real, not just flirtation.

And I love being with you.

You're all I want, everyone else is pointless.

I don't know how I feel.

But I know that it's for real.

I can honestly say that I'm in love with you.
I can't stop thinking about you.

Regrets...

Regret is when you look back and realize that you could have done more.

Regret is when you realize that what you did was wrong.

Regret is when you look back on life and wish that you could go back and relive a single day of you past.

Regret is remembering someone who meant so much to you and remembering how you did them wrong.

Regret is looking back on something that meant so much to you and never realize what you really had.

Regret is never saying I love you.

Regret is going on in life, having so many regrets in life, and never having the ability to do anything about it.

Regret is never remembering to live life to the fullest.

Love Quote of The Day: The pain is deep and yet I nurture it. It reminds me of you and though it hurts, I wouldn't want to change anything to out story...

Why Love Is So Complicated?

Why love is so complicated?

Are we meant to be together?

On the inside, I am being killed.

I thought it was you and me.

Why do we fight?

Stained tears on my pillow.

I will cry all night, just to be with you.

Do you love me?

Sometimes I am frightened.

So why can't we be together?

Why love is so complicated?

Love Quote Of The Day: If I love you, let you be. And if it's true love, you will come back to me.

To those that always read my blog: Sorry for not updating my blog for so long...I will be blogging quite often again...    =D

All I See Is You...

I remember us, the way we used to be.

I'd hold you in my arms, your smile so sweet to me.

But now when I see you, you look right through me.

I feel so lonely now.

But when I close my eyes, . . . . . . . . all I see is you.

The love we used to share, gone up in whirl winds.

Will I ever love, or ever live again?

I am tired of crying, and I am done trying,

To remember all about you.

But when I close my eyes, . . . . . . . all I see is you.

All the love I am sending, the memories I won't sell.

I know there must be an ending to the story I will tell.

I dream only of your love and happiness in life.

I try not to think of you.

But when I close my eyes, . . . . . . . all I see is you.

Love Quote of The Day: A heart that loves is always young.....

Days Without You...

I miss you so much, day and night.

I can't realize why you're gone.

I just think I treat you right, but now I'm again alone.

The days without you are so long.

And these days without your kiss and smile.

I don't even know what I've done wrong.

I've been thinking of this for a while.

A few questions that I need to know: -

1. Why does my heart feel so sad?

2. Why you could ever hurt me so?

3. Why can't I get you out of my head?

Now I'm standing here alone with this wright upon my heart.

And wondering why you're gone.

Remembering our feelings from the start.

In my mind, I have all my memories in a range.

Each moment spent with you is unforgettable.

But I can't realize what made you change.

For me, this is just un-get-able.

I know I won't pull through without you by my side.

So baby, come to me - don't hide and run.

The only thing I want is to be with you.

Please baby, make my wish come true.

Don't you know that you make my days count?

And I'm always happy when you're around.

It doesn't matter what we do, as long as I'm here with you.

Love Quote of The Day: Love is a many splendid thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love...

Why I Love You?

The perfect girl use to be only in dreams it seemed.

But when I first see you, it changes everything.

I know right off that you are the one, I hope we can be together.

Whenever we hug, I get chills up my spine.

And I think about you non-stop, all the time.

Nothing can change what you mean to me.

You're all that I want, and all that I need.

When I look into those beautiful brown eyes, it makes me realize that you are the most gorgeous on the Earth.

I found my girl, so now I can end my search.

Every night when I get down to pray, I thank God for you because you brighten up my day.

I will give the world away just to be with you.

Now that I've found you, there's nothing I wouldn't do.

I will sacrifice it all just to be with you.

Because you have turned my life around.

When you're with me, it's impossible for me to frown.

I will cherish every moment we spend in your presence.

Because you're my perfect angel and God sent you to me from Heaven.

Now tell me that we belong together.

Please tell me that I will be with you forever.

The me that you love me.

I just want you to see that I truly love you.

You're the proof that my love is alive.

Something is going on, it's mixing up my insides.

A feeling so new, and so special it seems.

My love for you sends the angels to their knees.

I'm trying to show that our love will defy time.

Even God couldn't send enough words from above to explain that you're the one and only true love.

There's millions of reasons I wish our love will never end.

But simply, you're not only my girl, you're my best friend.

And this is why I truly love you.

Love Quote of The Day: To be your friend was all I ever wanted; to be your lover was all I ever dreamed.

I'll Be There...

When you find yourself on your own, remember that you're not alone.

And when you're feeling down and blue, remember that I'll be there for you.

When I'm not with you, remember that I'll be in your heart.

I think about you every night and day.

When I'm with you, I wanna stay.

I hope you'll always remember me, cause I'll remember you for eternity.

I never want to let you go, because I like you.

If there was anything I could do, I would do it just to please you.

You know it's well and truly true, I would do anything for you.

When you're looking at the stars in the eternal blue,

remember that each star out there is a reason why I like you.

And when you think you're alone and when no one is there at all,

I'll be right in front of you to catch you when you fall.

Love Quote of The Day: You were the truth, she was a lie, and I am the fool...

What You Are To Me?

You're the sun that warms my face.

You're the wind that embrace.

You're the calmness of the ocean sound brings.

You're the beauty of flowers in the spring.

You've given me hope when I didn't have any.

You've given me forgiveness that I didn't deserve.

You've given me more than I could ever ask for.

You've even given me love when I didn't love you in return.

You are my very best friend.

You are my soul mate to the end.

You are the love of my heart.

I know we will never part.

So if you ever need me, know that I'll be there for you.

I want to love you  the way you have loved me.

I want you to know how much I care.

No matter where I go or what I do, I'll spend the rest of my life showing how much I love you.

Love Quote of The Day: The ones that you love the most are usually the ones that hurt you the most.

End of College Life ~

Finally college life had come to an end...

I seriously gonna miss college so much...especially my classmates,friends and new friends that I met this year...

I really had a lot of fun in college...

And I wanna thank all my classmates for everything...

Petrina, Yi Wenn, Wan Shin, Elysia, Iza, Victor, Adrian, Felicia & Xin Yi...

Thank you to all of you for everything...

I gonna miss you guys so much...

We must have a reunion dinner every year and everyone must come...

And I met a lot of new friends this year...

All of them are from the January 2010 intake...

Even though we known each other for 4 months only, but I'm happy to have you all as my friends...

Like Jo, Olivia, May, Yan Leng, Peck Hwa, Rachel Wong, Kathleen, Hui Qian and many more...

Somehow, I miss the staffs in TCSH also...

Like Ms. D, Sarah, Rahul, Ananda, Ai Rene and more...

And my lecturers too, Ms. Tang, Ms. Tan & Mr. Yong...

And a specially thank to Ms. Jackie, my mentor...and my edboard teacher advisor...

I wish that time can slow down for me...

If stop, that's even better...

I really wanna hang out with all these people more...

One year & six months is just too fast...

~ Memories ~

Felicia, Elysia, Gaeun, Petrina, Wan Shin & Janice

Me & Yoshnee

Kee Aik & Me

Bobo, John, Me & Arthur

Yi Wenn, Petrina & Me

Janice, Me & Wan Shin

Gaeun & Me

Elaine & Me

Rachel & Me

Charmaine & Me

Yvonne & Me

Kah Fai & Me

Me & Szi Yee

Me, Hui Sian & Szi Yee

Celine & Me

Rahul & Me

Me & Ananda


I gonna miss all my friends and college so much...
I will try to come back to visit as much as I can...
Will upload more photos on the next post...

Love Quote of The Day: With every smile I make without you; a little piece of my heart breaks...

Wonderful Week!!!

I had a very wonderful week this week...

I watched 2 movies on Thursday with Victor...

&

These two movies are must-watch-movie...

And I gonna watch Ironman 2 again tomorrow...

(^.^)

And I had a great night yesterday...

There was an event going on in my college last night...

Taylor's Got Talent...

The event was quite happening and I enjoyed throughout the event...

I wish Chelsea will win the game against Liverpool tomorrow...

Then my week will be 100% perfect...

And Chelsea will rule this season...

Love Quote of The Day: I think that I would rather die than to ever make you cry.....

Thank God & My Car...

I really wanna thank God & my car so much...

For saving my life...

I promise I'll never do the same mistake again...

To all the drivers in the world, NEVER EVER drive when you don't have enough sleep or tired...

Because this is very dangerous...and I am one of the example...

I went home kinda late, around 12.45am...

And I was kinda sleepy...

I think I fell asleep for 2-3 seconds...

Then the nightmare happened, my car banged on the concrete then ramped into the toll...

When I woke up, I noticed my car is lying 90 degree side way...

And I felt my neck was aching...

The first thing I did was loosen the seatbelt and look for my specs because I couldn't see...

After I looked for my pouch...

I took out my phone and called my Mum...

She was panicked and crying over the phone...

Sorry, Mum, for scaring you...

Sorry, Dad, for destroying your car...

My parents sent me to the hospital and the doctor said I am suffering from some damaged muscle tissues...

And at least 6 weeks to recover...

Means no futsal for me till A2 exams ends... *sigh*

I hope I can time travel and fix everything right...

Haiz...

No matter what, thank you, God, for saving my life...

And my strong and tough car...

Love Quote of The Day: I love her and that's the beginning of everything....